What I want to remember about that day:
Our smiles and happiness.
Exploring new places together.
The little blue flowers in the foreground.
Sam's grace & beauty.
And the enthusiasm in this catch.
The peace I felt while resting.
Watching them play together.
The vision and creative ingenuity that led this child to pick up an enormous stick and see a wheel.
The way Cam responded, taking care of everything immediately and capably.
His presence allowed me to sit with Sam, cup the blood from his chin in my hand and reassure him that, as Shawn Mullins says, "Everything is going to be alright." I also sang, "He's born to shimmer. He's born to shine. He's born to radiate."
Around that time, Sam and I had been enjoying a Mat Kearney song, Nothing Left to Lose. My favorite part of the song is the line, "I can still smell the pomegranates growing." "And I don't know how hard this wind will blow. Or where we'll go."
"Come on and we'll see... Like we were free... Come on and we'll try... One last time... Here we go. There's nothing left to lose."
Just before the accident, Cam had been reading to us from Hatchet by Gary Paulsen.
The night before, we'd read about how Brian, the main character, had been trampled by a moose then hit by a tornado while he was still recovering.
Brian showed remarkable resilience, "I might be hit but I'm not down." he'd said.
Minutes before the accident, Cam had read about how Brian had started to rebuild despite tragedy and misfortune.
Later, while Sam and I were at home, recuperating from the shock, Christopher Paolini reintroduced us to Jeod Longshanks. In Eldest, he writes, "When he turned toward them, a nasty scar gleamed white..." "To Roran, it bespoke steel in the man."
Talk about steel, bravery and resilience...
This little boy has them all.
By the bucket load.
I want to remember the kindness, concern, compassion, regard and empathy we were shown by most of the medical staff we encountered.
I want to remember Cam standing behind me with one hand on Sam's leg and the other on my back.
Comforting, supporting and uplifting both of us with his touch, while I held Sam's hand during the procedure.
What I want to remember is not the big gash in Sam's face.
But the way he and Cam laughed and joked and the look of peace on his face despite it.
I want to remember the way he gained reassurance when he looked over my shoulder at Cam.
And the look of love he directed at me.
It was a time of great trauma for us.
But also a time of teamwork, much nurturing, tenderness and love.